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 The Lounge 
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Joined: Fri Oct 17, 2008 9:46 pm
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Did I hear that well? Did you just say what I think you said?! DID YOU CALL ME A SISSY YOU MAGGOTS?!?


Actually, I'm okay with that. I'm 0kay with a l0t 0f things.



Going absolutely offtopic, I got suddenly curious about Roast's AI, RoastBot. What language did you code it in, again?


Sat Jun 11, 2011 9:19 pm
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Data Realms Elite
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Joined: Tue May 25, 2010 8:27 pm
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Location: Constant motion
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Oh, Tasha. I should really fix her, she broke herself. I coded her in Java, she runs in a command window, an can be spoken to on IRC. Honestly I did very little work on her, she's collaboration of some Java libraries.


Sat Jun 11, 2011 9:27 pm
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Data Realms Elite
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I can't access the awesome chatlog right now, when I can I'll post it here.


Sat Jun 11, 2011 10:04 pm
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Joined: Mon Jun 28, 2010 10:06 pm
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Personally, Maruchan ramen is my favorite.
I always prepare it like this.

Requirement:
ramen
water
measuring cup
microwave
hands

Instructions:
1. take water, put about 1.5 cups to 2 cups of water in the measuring cup.
2. use your hands to pick up the water, which is in the measuring cup, and place it in the microwave.
3. use your hands to press 2:00, two minutes, on the microwave. Press start.
4. find ramen, preferably in the cup, and take off the paper outside, then the plastic, then the lid halfway off.
5. wait until the water is done, then use your hands to remove it from the microwave and pour it into the cup of ramen.
5.5 pour any excess water out of the cup.
6. take the ramen cup, now with water, to wherever you want to eat it.
7|A. eat the ramen like a man, by chugging it right out of the cup
7|B. eat the ramen like a normal human being, and get a fork or some chop sticks.

so, yea. It is really good. I advise eating the ramen as soon as physically possible.


Sat Jun 11, 2011 10:16 pm
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Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2009 10:50 pm
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Tomaster wrote:
Contrary, have you ever peed while taking a dump? Unless you do that standing up too, I imagine you've peed sitting down.

I... I honestly can't figure out how to pee sitting down. How do you? Is my penis in the wrong place? I don't understand. I literally sat down 5 minutes ago and tried to do it and couldn't. My testicles were in the way and I don't get it. Do you sit the same way you take a dump?

Can someone draw me a diagram or something. I googled it and I literally still cannot figure it out.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 1:01 am
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You have to sit on the back of the seat, then take your penis in your hand and put it in the center of your scrote, between the testes, and push it gently down in between them. It's like splitting the Red Sea. Now your urethra should be pointing at a downwards angle within the bowl. A note of caution: Peeing too hard will result in backsplash on your anus, and that will make you feel violated.

IN RELATED NEWS: inFamous is so goddamn fun, I just spent like 5 hours playing it.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 1:03 am
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wtf?

That's the sissiest thing I have ever heard. I'd make a sassy analogy but I honestly cannot think of anything so un-masculine.

If I ever need to pee and ♥♥♥♥ at the same time I will pee standing up and just let my ♥♥♥♥ fall on the floor.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 1:17 am
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Loose Canon
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Ok Contrary, let me try to explain this.
First up, you stand in front of the toilet, facing away from it.
Next, grab your junk.
Okay, lower yourself onto the toilet, guiding your junk into the space between the front edge of the seat and your pelvis.
Sit down, with your junk more or less hanging into the toilet, depending upon size of penis. Make sure not to sit on either your balls or your penis.
If done correctly, you should be able to piss into the toilet while sitting down. All women learn this procedure, and if a woman can do it you can too.

EDIT: One important caveat. If your ♥♥♥♥ is so large that it hits water when you sit down, pull out immediately. I am unsure of the size of your ♥♥♥♥, so this may or may not be a problem. If it is, then you cannot properly pee while sitting.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 1:58 am
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Lower all lower body garments.
Sit on the toilet seat, as far back as you can.
Urinate at roughly a 88 degree angle to the horizontal, dead ahead, with medium power.
Enjoy the success.

Sitting down is good as you can chill, and maybe grab some reading material.
You aren't in the speed-run urinate mode.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:02 am
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Joined: Sun Jul 13, 2008 9:57 am
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Jesus H Christ.

Image

If you cant get your penis past your testicles whilst sitting down there's two possibilities
  • Legs aren't spread -> no gap
  • Penis too small - unlikely (not because you're SOOO UNMANLY but because it'd have to be like an inch long when flaccid

Standing up is for reference to the changes in sitting down, lean forwards a little.

Genitals abstracted and blue for clarity. No idea why I chose blue, but there you go.

MOVING ON

My ludum dare food is literally HakuBaku ramen + Soya + Camembert cheese. Sounds potentially poisonous, tastes like greasy heaven.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:46 am
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Bahaha Geti. Its sad it came to that.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:55 am
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DRLGrump
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...wow...this got too detailed for me.

Who here has a job? What is it, and who enjoys it?


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:55 am
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Ragdollmaster wrote:
You have to sit on the back of the seat, then take your penis in your hand and put it in the center of your scrote, between the testes, and push it gently down in between them. It's like splitting the Red Sea. Now your urethra should be pointing at a downwards angle within the bowl. A note of caution: Peeing too hard will result in backsplash on your anus, and that will make you feel violated.



Wait what? Unless you have ultra-thick tighs or something, there should be no need to push. I mean, gravity goes a long way.


Also, HK: if the junk goes as far down as the water normally, then said person should probably see a doctor.

Y'know what, just look at Geti's diagram, he got it down perfectly.

Also let's say this topic is now dead and move on to more palatable subjects. Kittens, for example.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:56 am
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Cafeteria food worker. Yay 12 hour a day weekends.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 2:58 am
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I'm a part time salesman at a local Staples. ♥♥♥♥ would be easy if the manager wasn't such a notorious ♥♥♥♥.



http://www.standvirtual.com/carros/Merc ... /P4506240/

I am so going to buy this thing in the near future. It's a bit expensive, but also appears to be in pretty good shape, considering that it's a 30 year old merc with little to no damage.


Sun Jun 12, 2011 3:02 am
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