You get The Spanish Inquisition!
I insert someone who skins all their mecha girls to be scantily clad. I mean me.

You get yourself and keep reinserting yourself in a perpetual cycle of scantily clad insanity.

I insert a combo breaker.

You get enough drama to power a small city for a day.

I insert an old pair of glasses.

You get some comments about how ugly they are.
I insert a hat that belongs to the mafia.

You get the hat belonging to Indiana Jones

I insert minecraft

You get a millionare.

I insert old hats.

You get lots of money from selling them to the machine.
I insert a triple-A battery.

You get tax credit for your donation, and then a warrant for your arrest. Body in the trunk.

I insert lamp.

You get a leg, but it breaks and you are out of glue.
I insert a WEPON.

You get a dictionary

I insert a corrupt official

You get the USA.
I insert WH40k Tactical Space Marine Squad.

You get out several hundred WH40K fanboys.
I insert The Isotrop.

You get John Freeman from the top of the sky.
I insert someone previously failing to get the joke.

You get the community

I insert marshmallows and madness (the flash series)

You get a plushie toy of Tricky the Clown. Yay!

I insert a super-popular flash video from Newgrounds.