While I'm normally all for psychopathic disregard for any and all life, I'd stick to the virgin a day plan until we've got some power.

You guys are not even remotely close to socially accepted behavior. Not only this argument but actually having the nudity mod installed.....

OT: The first Morag tong quest was extremely easy, just backstab the bastard for a near insta-kill just because it takes him a second to draw his sword.
And give the ring to the ♥♥♥♥'t-remember. Then rob said AFFEWNICR's secret hiding spot for the powers of the ring!
BTW, quick travel to vivec to get in the morag tong.(IIRC)

Imperial legion is boring as hell, and what's wrong with the infuriatingly hard main quest?

Explore!
And find pants! We must find pants before they put two and two together and arrest us!

I decide to man up, and head into the Captain's office.
He seems unbothered by my nudity.



I decide to ask him about Morrowind, and he mentions duties, and gives me a package and directions, along with another 87 gold.
Not too shabby.

Now, to explore!
I head out into the world, and decide to look inside some rather unsturdy looking shacks.



Oh, do I see a brightly coloured book? Maybe it has pictures!
I'm disappointed to learn that it doesn't have any pictures, but it is worth about 150 gold, which is even better.
I grab it, and prepare to run from the man in the shack, but he seems pretty chill about it.

Whatever. I decide that this is a pretty good racket, and look for another shack.
There's only one other which isn't locked, and it has a (typically) ugly Argonian in it.
I ransack his house, and take most of his food.



Like the Dunmer, he doesn't mind, nor does he react to my nudity.
I feel this is a bit mean of him, so I decide to punch him in the face.

I miss, but he reacts, lightning fast with an uppercut to my jaw.
I realise that he'll probably kill me if I don't do something, so I pull out the dagger I stole, and try to stab him in the gut.
This time, I hit, but the wound isn't bad. More stabs just slide off his scales, or produce equally unhelpful wounds.

He knocks me to the floor, and I decide to make myself scarce.
I scramble to my feet, and burst out of the door, splashing in the shallow sea.
Before I have a chance to think I'm safe, he follows, fast as ever, and hits me in the back, knocking me into the sea.
I'm both winded and under water, and I inhale a lot off it.
I manage to get up, but he pushes me under again, and I inhale lungfuls of water.

I finally escape his iron grip, and make it onto land, weak and wet.
He sends a powerful fist towards my head, knocking me to the floor.
The power of the blow rolls me a couple of yards into a wall, and I'm unable to recover as he strides towards me, murder in his eyes.



We I got pwnt! Would y'all like to load a save?

Note: Was not expecting to be drowned to within an inch of my life when I punched him in the face.
I literally had about 5 hp left when I made it on land.

Didn't get any pictures of the fight, because I was too busy trying not to die.
In vain, as it happens.

THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED HAD WE BEEN AN ORC!

I say we accept defeat and make an Orc.

Bro, why didn't you use Lover's Kiss and stabbed the hell out of his paralyzed form?

First, the shot of a naked us flying headfirst into a wall is absolutely hilarious.


Second, I don't think that lizardman was virgin enough. I'm not even sure if it was female. When you reload, search for a more helpless target, or a three-handed axe.

Curse you Pete, now I have a very powerful urge to dig out Morrowind, install it and play it until 5am. Every. Single. Day,

I didn't use Lover's Kiss because I am stupid.
It wouldn't have been worth trying to stab him, though, but I could have run away. Ah well, next time.

More helpless targets might be a good idea, but for a random peasant in a rubbish sea-side shack, he surprised me.

Maxim, I'm glad to hear that I've ruined your social life for a couple of days/weeks/months.
It makes me proud, it really does.

So, what do the majority of you chaps want to do?
Reload, and give Data Gandersnout another chance at life?
Or make a new character (I'll skip through character creation and just let you pick name/race/skills)?

RELOAD. WE HAVE ALREADY SPENT TOO MANY PANTS TO GIVE UP NOW.

Aw, fine. Let's reload...

BUT ONE DAY!
ONE DAY WE SHALL BE AN ORC!

Reload, ♥♥♥♥.

Just to expand on what I said before, reload, and repeat our actions up to the point before we punched superargonian in the face. (or at least tried to)

What kind of weapon are we skilled in? Get one of them.
*hint* Slaver Cave for gear *hint*

I'm not 100% sure, but I think we're proficient in long blades.