uh no I'm not, calling you a massive twat whom makes wild inferences and has no idea what he's talking about would be something that goes against the Rules which I would Never Do as I Respect you And the Rules.

spoilers: there is no rule saying I can't post in your thread and join the "game", cry about it

I'd like to point out that there are actually rules, but even if they weren't you still shouldn't act like this anyways. I believe that this should be classified as "Disturbance" or "Harassment" as opposed to trolling, but it's true that there isn't a specific forum rule that says you can't be a ♥♥♥♥ to everyone. Oh wait, yes there is, it's called "Use common sense".

Daman, if you want to join in, follow the instructions in the first post. Otherwise, please take your business elsewhere.

If you honestly want me to judge this thread by the full standards of the forum rules, then I would be happy to oblige.

However, at a standard rate of 1 warning per post that does not meet qualifications (heavy offenders being off topic, spam, and general stupidity) I'd probably end up handing out about a thousand board warnings and at least half that many bans.

Again, if you honestly want me to do that, I would certainly do so.

While I appreciate your taking note of my less-than-subtle instructions at previous points in this topic, the fact remains that this entire thread is a monstrous conglomeration of everything that I dislike about this forum.

Yes, these are my personal feelings. Unfortunately, the objectivity of moderators is not assured, and it's a combination of charity and laziness on my part that this thread is still open and not junked. I'm not about to junk it because you disagree with me, but I'm just going to say two things:

1. Keeping Daman out of this thread is far, far more trouble than it's worth
2. The correct response to someone trolling you is not moaning about it to everyone with ears. Use the UCP to add Daman to your foe list, ignore his posts, and move on with your frankly stupid game. I'm fine with that, there's no reason you shouldn't be fine with that, and then everyone's happy.

OH, and the next person who posts something about this issue (feel free to PM me, though) is going to get, at minimum, a board warning.

Waiting on Foa and rjhw now.

waiting for hyper to roll now

Hmmm, here I am thinking, is she [ Daman ] really a she.

Rolling. Blegh, I regret this name now...

CrazyMLC[4]: Since icing everything over failed sorta last time, you try again, this time accounting for the existence of other people. You try to suck heat out from the island again, but it still hasn't thawed from the first time you froze it over, so there isn't much heat to suck. Your freezing doesn't do very much, just setting the ice back to its initial coldness. Despite the ice, the sharks have arrived, and are starting to clamor over the ice floe you created earlier. They see you, and immediately let loose their signature demonic howl.
Abilities:
- Pyro, Aero, Hydro, and GeoKinesis
- #-Point Star
- Olympian Power
- Metabolic Regeneration
- Photosynthesis
- Razor Leaves
Inventory:
- Nautical Shiv
- Wiffles' Orb
- DecaBow
- DecaBow Quiver
- Another Heat Orb
Injuries:
- Attracting Sharks (Lasts 12 turns)

rjhw1 [6]: The ice is only really covering the surface of the island, but whatever.
You try digging at the ground around you, using the DM arm to break the ice, and both arms to dig through the sand and dirt. Suddenly, the sand with a vicegrip on your head loosens, and you yank your head free from the sand. Then, the ground underneath you collapses.
Because of your lack of gravity, this shouldn't be a problem. Except you no longer lack gravity. You plummet downwards into the hole, Rabbats gleefully squealing as they follow you down. After a few moments, you emerge out of the tunnel you were falling down into a massive cavern, one that must stretch further end to end than the island above it.
Abilities:
- Greater Zombie Control
- Dark Matter Synthesis
- Zombification (Increased speed and strength)
- Dragon Pulse Style
- Surging Dragon Pulse
- Twisting Dragon Tornado Kick
- Solarkinesis
Inventory:
- Wimpy Facial Hair
- Spas 12 (7 shots left)
- 24 12 Gauge Shells
- Loaded AS50 (13 Extra Rounds)
- Scythe (Death Render)
- Rabbat Swarm (45 Rabbats)

Tomaster [3]: Dismissing your ever-useless shade, you summon a new one, this time a Greater Shade of Metal. Nice! Sadly, Metal golems, shades, and spirits are not known for their intelligence. The shade will be able to interact with your weaponry and probably repair the Lawnchair, but the Syringe Launcher is out of its league. The shade looks around, then sees you and gives an impatient grunt. Looks like it wants to get to work.
Inventory:
- M79 Grenade "Lawnchair" (No ammo) (Broken)
- TF2 Syringe Gun (66 syringes, filled with random drugs) (Broken)
- Pulpy (Large Flaming Mace)
Abilities:
- Wing (+1 to dodge if flying)
- Summon Shade
- Flickering Invisibility
- Super Strength

Foa [3]: "Screw this."
Tired of being stuck to a cliff, you try to dislodge yourself, rocking back and forth to try and unstuck yourself. Suddenly, your legs give a loud crack, and you freeze in place.
"Meep."
Your already broken DM legs snap completely in half at the knees, and you begin to float in mid air.
Thankfully, you forgot you still had no gravity on yourself. Out of the blue, gravity decides to hate you, and you start falling towards the ground. From the height you're at, it'll hurt like a ♥♥♥♥♥, if not a fatal ♥♥♥♥♥.
Inventory:
- HIGH-SPEED HANDCANNON
- DM Legs (Cheetah, VERY Broken)
- Fedora of the Gods
Injuries:
- Weakened Zombie Virus (Zombification in - turns)

JJA79 [5] Frightened, your seagull instincts take over, and guide you to the highest point near you, in this case the still frazzled Shadow. Flapping up to his head, you regain control, and sit yourself down to meditate. Because of the Seagull's small mind and the fact that it isn't your natural form, you accidentally turn yourself back to your regular human form while still remaining a portion of the Seagull brain, allowing you to communicate with birds.
Abilities:
- Life Energy Stealing
- Always Thinking
- Gyrokinesis (Gravity Control)
- Ergokinesis (Energy Control)
- Bird Communication

ShadoWKilleR255 [5] Ignoring the voice addressing you and the sudden appearance of a JJ on your head, you atomize the air around you, direct it through your flesh down to the bones, and reform it into Carbon molecules, arranged in a pattern for maximum strength with minimum weight. It only takes a few seconds, and after you finish, you have nearly bones that can't be broken by normal (Non-Ridiculous) means, and you even managed to mend your broken leg!

Abilities:
- Precision Mass/Energy Control
- Telekinesis
- Nanotube Skeleton
Inventory:
- 5 Small Energy Orbs
- Archipelago Map

Frederic [-] "Mistress, I profusely apologize for the inconvenience, but as you can see, I'm not very fit for combat at the moment. I think I need to rest more and recover some energy, so I won't be able to defend the group against the sharks- would you please keep them safe, since they seem to be potential associates of Milady, until I can take my place as her guardian back?"
"Not in my job description. I'm not intervening with these sharks unless they attack Fiona."
Frederic, knowing that Blue will be immovable in her decision, gives a sigh, then folds up into a ball, and goes into Hibernation mode until his energy regenerates. (3 TURNS)

Energy Level: 49%

Game Event: "Oy. Frederic really did a number on your arm, eh?"
"JUST FIX IT!"
"Hush. No need to be snippy."
A soft blue glow washes over Fiona's arm, and Blue snaps it back into place with an accompanying yelp of pain from Fiona. The glow then intensifies for a moment, and finally fades away.
"Better?"
"Much."

Foa, unable to stop himself or save himself from his fall, spirals through the air for what feels like hours, resigned to his fate of crashing into the ground, when he is jarred out of his thoughts by a mid-air stop.
Looking down, Foa sees four blue crystals, each about 4 inches long and 1 inch wide, arranged in an inverted pyramid underneath him.
"You're all like children. Without me here, you'd all be dead from running with scissors."
Blue is floating in mid air in front of Foa, who is currently suspended face up by the crystals. Blue points her open palm towards the cliff where Foa's feet are stuck, then clenches her hand and jerks her arm back. The rock around Foa's feet separates cleanly from the cliff, and Blue lowers both Foa and his feet gently to the ground.
"Here. Don't lose this, it's the only one I have."
Blue tosses you a jet black hat, a Fedora in fact! You happily put the Fedora on.

"What game?"
"Hmm! Now there are two people who are! But you will both need work, yes. Currently, you are both against the rules."
Shadow persists in questioning the voice, who steps forward to reveal a tall man in a blood red robe.
"What rules? What game? Where are we? Talk to me!"
The man just mutters to himself for a few seconds, then stops as if he just noticed JJ and Shadow for the first time.
"Oh my. This will not do, not at all. You both need to be balanced out, yes, yes you do. Off you go!"
A wall of red wind erupts between the two of you and the man, then curves around you two. Everything goes white again.

Sooo he teleported us the first time?

>While everything is white try to increase my combat effectiveness by augmenting it with my Ergokinesis

I can control the physical or kinetic energy of things. I should be able to hyper-accelerate my attacks to do more damage.

"What does this hat do?"

Oh and JJ, take on the mindset of a pigeon, extremely adaptable ( like quadruple your learning capabilities ) , and are very dexterous ( the normal pigeon is the equivalent of a master surgeon ) .
Seagulls... all I can say are dumb ♥♥♥♥.

Note: Inspired by real purchase of real Black Fedora for real $10.
Best money I've spent all month.

So yeah, TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IT DOES.

JJ, I am serious about the adaptability and dexterity of the pigeon, IT WILL SAVE YOUR ASS, and it goes well with "Always Thinking", and your -kinesis... which you seem to ♥♥♥♥ the hell up.

Says the person who has no legs.