By general consensus of IRC, welcome to a rousing game of diseasequest!

You have a mild sense of other beings around you.
You have 200 units of energy remaining.

Enter command.

Lick your dinner table.

There is no dinnertable in your vicinity.
In fact, you're not even smart enough to attempt to lick a dinnertable.
Or know what it is even.

Locate, then lick the aforementioned "others".

Expend 50 units of energy to locate and assimilate/absorb said other beings.
Expend 100 units of energy by dividing yourself into 3 entities.

Attempt to contract syphilis.

You absorb the other organisms, 2 in total, you then divide into three separate cells.
You have 50 units of energy left.

Locate more organisms. Hunt them down and render them into more energy

You hunt down 4 other organisms and replenish your energy to 200 units.

Ripoff from ParasiteQuest and Toasterquest

Use 10 energy to light your surroundings, so we have an idea of what is going on around us. If the surroundings are already adequetly lit, use 150 energy to blow them up.

I made the recent toasterquest so shut up.

You have no means with which to light your surroundings.

Ripoff from ParasiteQuest

The environment is not lit, nor are you able to light it.
You have no means with which to blow it up, either.