wow your the first person who knows about that song ive ever seen/heard/saw talk in a forum.

you get a suit in a man.
I insert TORG!

You gain the title Storm Knight and a book allowing you to bend reality. You can rapidly heal yourself and no longer need health insurance! Briefly read the wiki on torg

I insert a Scott Pilgrim comic

You become a vegan.

I insert some pixel art.

The vending machine, being produced in Japan, gives you


I insert a freshly minted coin

You receive a freshly made dollar.

I insert my inserter.
(hehehe)

Your inserter is chopped off.

I insert freshly squeezed lemon juice.

The vending machine throws freshly-unsqueezed lemons back at your face.

I insert TIGJam.

You get nothing, but I get the best game idea ever;
You play as Grif, chasing unicycling Data across the roofs of San Francisco.
Includes a bonus mid-game twist where Data rips off his shirt with his mahscles and Grif has to run.

I insert the above game idea.

You get a fanbase twice the size of drl.

I insert a tree.

You get log and sapling mini-blocks pouring out of the slot.

I insert an Iron Bucket of Lava and a Golden Apple.

Hot, molten applesauce pours out, simultaneously burnig and fully healing you.
I insert all of the levels. All of them.

You get a ticket to this: http://www.all-levels.com/

I insert a paper with the words, "Rule 34" written on it.

The machine garbles a bit, and nothing seemingly happens. You feel a bit of a draft and, Kias, you realize today was a bad day to wear that kilt. You see the camera in the floor.

I first notify the local news station and insert Kias's revealing tape

You get kicked out of the news station, only to find you are in the Playboy Mansion. Then you wake up.

I insert the Allusion that Yoman inserted and Hyper did not get.

You get a Spicy Spring Apple!

I insert a Flux Capacitor, a hunk of Plutonium, a 1.21GW battery and various buttons, dials and switches. Also, 3 magazine-cutout-letters: D, M and C.