Nonsequitorian wrote:
I think it's because you need to "git giud." As a pro gamer-doctor, I recommend 3 servings of Mountain Dew per week day, and then double on the week-ends. You should make sure to 420 Blaze it every time you see the numbers 4 or 20 (and blaise it twice as hard when you see both 4 and 20 together). Also, eat lots of fish, preferably COD.
You'll notice yourself gitting gudder within a week, but symptoms might pursue until the next Linkin Park album comes out.
Son, I am the most professional gamer on this godforsaken forum. Mountain Dew? Pah! You never hear of Relentless™? All the buzz without any twitchiness brought about by other brands™
I have a dozen empty cans on the far side of my room, and a dozen full ones reserved for game time. Because playing half-heartedly is not for those who are Relentless™!
And blazing? The only blaze I know is the blaze of my gunports, thanks to Relentless™!
Groovy.
And
real gamers sustain themselves off the pure malice bestowed upon them by raging opponents. And Relentless™!
Also, music? Music!?!? Son, back when I was your age, fighting in Gamenam...the war is not like Gameraq like the fighting boys (Relentless™ bastards that they are, they're still lucky as ♥♥♥♥) of today are in. The Gamekong were crafty devils, and I watched many a fine man be brought down by space invader fire and ghosts slipping past the lines. Ever seen a man run out of hitpoints with your own two damned eyes?
I have.
It's not a pretty sight, seeing as their life drains away, those last flickers of who they are fading from their eyes like a smouldering ember, then the silence afterwards. No more crying for mommy, no more raging about how it happened, no more pleading with the GMs for more lives.
Just silence. Not knowing if they're gonna respawn at the base like a truly Relentless™ soldier. Most of them don't.
Most of them aren't even sent back home, just buried beneath a shady tree and left there. Forgotten, in time.
Like tears in the rain.
Time to die....
RELENTLESS™!I sure hope you guys realize that was all satire. Just pointing that out. Back to normal broadcasting from here.Adriaan wrote:
And don't forget to take a serving of doritos with every meal you eat.
Blimey. That sounds horrible. I'm not really a fan of Doritos, though I have a soft spot for lots and lots of biscuits. Custard creams are alright, but I'm more of a NICE man. Malted Milk is alright too, but tends to dissolve a bit too easy, and chocolate digestives are a poisoned chalice. Especially if you're a bulk biscuit eater like myself, but that has less to do with being a fan of biscuits and more to do with a prodigious appetite.
So prodigious is it that one day I shall ascend to the heavens and devour the stars themselves.
Anyway, if I had to have crisps, I'd go with McCoys. Better flavor than Walkers in my opinion and they have a nice crunch, like the bones of small children.
p3lb0x wrote:
Doritos nutritional value has recently been investigated to actually reduce KDR and raise chance of homosexuality. I heartily recommend trying out pudding instead, while it has gotten a lot of flak for being too fluid and slightly goey. It might actually have increased amounts of L-337 vitamins compared to similar foods available to the typical gamer.
Pudding is a little vague there, friend. First thing to come to mind was the thought of a
Yorkshire Pudding, but that clearly, clearly didn't match up when you mentioned fluid. Custard is the closest thing we have, maybe?
I must confess I am not much of a snacker at my desk other than biscuits and the occasional chocolate. Maybe some fruit if it's in season. The fruit from the shops is usually bruised and unpleasant, so I tend to pick my own from the fruit farms a few miles from my house. Fresh peaches, straight off the branch, are delicious
Oh, and incase anyone is interested,
I got another review out on Thursday.Got a reviewer key for Wealth of Nations, too. Been meaning to give it a spin but haven't been in the mood. My aunt can't even stand at this point. She's going to go soon. Could be tomorrow, could be next week or next month. But she's going to go.
Anyway, it's three in the morning. I'm off to bed before I start rambling.